He'll Be Coming Down the Chimney When He Comes
by acirelemagne
Summary: Emmett decides to surprise Rose with a holiday get away in the mountains. Surely nothing bad could happen? Written by Acireamos and Anuddaone for the "A Very Cullen Christmas" Collaboration Contest by wtvoc and jandco.


**A/N: OK, here's our little contribution to the "A Very Cullen Christmas" Collaboration Contest that Withthevampsofcourse and Jandco put together. It's Vamp Emmett/Rose and set at an indeterminate date. **

**We hope you like it!**

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It was going to be perfect. The house was decorated, twinkling lights, tinseled tree, stockings hung by the fire. Well, by the fireplace because I was standing in the fireplace; it was one of those huge monstrosities that you could walk into.

Esme had renovated this cabin in the mountains a few years ago and she really went all out. I guess you would call it lodge style, with lots of stone, leather, and wood. Rustic was the word she used. I liked it, reminded me of home. Except there was an indoor bathroom. Not that I needed it anymore but it was there. No outhouses at a Cullen home.

When I overheard Rose talking to Alice about Christmas a few weeks ago and how she hoped I had gotten her something different, I freaked out. I mean, I have given her clothes, jewelry, cars. But I wanted to do something different this time. Then Esme mentioned the cabin and how it would be fun to come up as a family again and it dawned on me.

We could have it all to ourselves, no one to listen or read our thoughts or feel our feelings. Privacy is such a commodity in our family, that a holiday alone just the two of us would be perfect. Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't dumb enough to forget the jewelry but I was planning on the time we spent together to part of the gift too.

Now I just had to figure out how to get up the chimney without destroying the thing. I had a plan, and it was going to be great. I just needed to work out a few kinks.

--

How cliché. Really? Mrs. Santa? I thought my husband had a better imagination than this. I mean, if there was going to be an oversized pillow-stuffed red coat involved, I am out. Seriously!

And he sure as hell better not ask me to sit on his lap and tell him if I had been a good girl this year. We have done that too many times to count.

Sighing, I slid the red, fur-trimmed teddy over my head. I knew there was no use in arguing with him. He would get his way, I might as well just enjoy it.

I just don't get what all his excitement was over. We have had a lot of Christmases together; this wouldn't be the first Santa themed night.

It was so sweet of Esme to offer us her cabin, especially considering…ah, well, it was just incredibly sweet of her. We knew she had just finished remodeling it and figured that she would want to save it for her and Carlisle some special time away, so when she offered it up at the first mention of renting a place for the two of us for Christmas this year we were shocked, but didn't hesitate in accepting. The Rockies at Christmas, nothing could be more perfect.

And we were alone. No grumbling from anyone if we became too…expressive during our activities. No interruptions. No school. No drama. Just me and my husband and lots of time.

Black heels and one last look in the mirror, noting that unsurprisingly I made this sad cliché look good - no, perfect, – I left the room to search out Emmett.

He told me to meet him in the living room. I had to roll my eyes; the living room with its Norman Rockwell-esque tree and fireplace, just waiting to become the scene of our very un-Norman Rockwell-esque fun.

I lounged into the chair that was positioned in the corner of the room after realizing that Emmett had not come in yet. I wondered what he was up to but decided to just wait and try not to even get inside that man's head…it was always a dangerous place.

While waiting, being more patient than normal really, I thought about Emmett and his silliness. For all his hi-jinks, I knew that he loved me and would do anything for me. This get away was a perfect example. He would love to be with the family during Christmas but he knew that I needed some time away.

I looked around the room. Emmett had really gone all out. The tree, beautifully trimmed with red and silver, a small collection of expertly wrapped gifts perfectly coordinated, garlands and baubles throughout the room, two perfect stockings hung on the mantle, and the distinct scent of the evergreen only reinforcing the ambiance.

I sighed again, but this time out of contentment. I mean, who could ask for more? All the scene was missing was my husband and maybe a nice, warm fi…oh!

"Emmett?!"

As my eyes fell onto the large hearth at the far wall of the room I couldn't suppress the urge to laugh. There was my husband; or at least the bottom half of my husband. And he was…quite naked and it seemed, stuck. I felt a surge of involuntary laughter.

Only my husband.

Alice's uncontrollable giggling when I ask her to give me a hint about this surprise was now explained. I was having trouble staying composed myself. But after the initial shock began to subside something else dawned on me…

It was kind of hot.

I mean, still funny as hell, but here I was, standing in front of an unused fireplace staring at the very exposed lower half of my husband. He had even…decorated for me.

"Rose, baby? Uh…" he voice sounded uncertain, like he was afraid I had left. I guess that wasn't entirely unimaginable really. "I am kinda stuck."

I had to laugh again. "Yes, Emmett, I can see that."

He was standing stalk still for a moment, and then he grunted and seemed to wiggle around a bit, but stopped after a little dust began to fall around him with a heavy sigh.

"Emmett?" Approaching the fireplace I leaned under his legs, checking that he was actually stuck, and he was. "Humph!" How he even thought that this would work, I have no idea. Its times like these where I thank goodness that he couldn't hurt himself.

"Yeah, uh, do you have any ideas?" he asked hopefully. I could almost see his pleading eyes and that sexy pout he gets when he needs help. He really is the cutest and sexiest man that I had ever met. Is it odd that his helplessness turned me on a little?

Hmm…I think I just might have an idea.

Smiling, I decided that if we were in this situation, why not enjoy it. I am sure Emmett was just waiting for me to start screaming. I was a bit surprised I wasn't screaming, honestly, but… I couldn't help it. I mean a Santa hat had never looked so appealing.

Licking my lips I stroked his thigh with my fingers gently teasing, making sure that my intentions were clearly spelled out.

"R-Rosalie, what are you doing!?" Emmett jumped suddenly, causing more dust to fall around his massive form into the hearth.

I couldn't help the giggle that escaped me. "Shh, Emmett, I was just trying to get you to _relax_. You know, maybe if you weren't so tense you could just climb right out…" I trailed off as my hand cupped his balls.

"uhnnn...yeah, relaxing might work," he moaned.

The Santa hat covering the head of his cock was now standing at attention, growing with every caress. I brought my hand from his balls and stroked the length of him lightly, right up to the fur lined brim. "I like this, Em," I ran my fingers against him lightly, "very festive," I breathed against his exposed skin. Emmett's strained grunt echoed from the fireplace around the room.

God, this is hot.

"But I think this would be much easier without it…" I used my teeth to remove the scrap of material from him. Without warning I took his entire hard dick into my mouth, my lips wrapped tightly around him, just like I knew he loved.

"OH GOD!"

I hummed around him lightly trying not to laugh, which brought about another low moan from the chimney and a little more dust.

I worked his cock slowly, using my tongue and teeth just enough to get him to make the sounds that were making me very wet.

Occasionally a light shower of dirt would fall around us when I knew he was struggling, wanting to wrap his hands into my hair and pull me against him. This knowledge allowed me to prolong the experience.

I pulled back and grasping him in my hands I began to use my tongue against the head, breathing cool air against his wet skin.

"Oh, Rosie…baby," he was pleading for release.

"What is it, Em?" I asked as I placed open mouth, wet kisses down the length of him and then his balls.

There seemed to be a large shower of ash as he pleaded, "please, I need…"

I took him into my mouth again without hesitation, this time faster and tighter, not wanting to torture him further.

--

I wish I could see her, or reach her but every time I moved, trying to see, more dust would fall and I could hear the stone of the chimney crunching around my shoulders.

She was sucking hard, her hand playing with my sack. When she scratched her fingernails on the underside of my nuts, I lost it. I needed to touch her, so I pushed outward, crushing through the fireplace, my hands grabbing on to her head. I watched as she bobbed up and down unfazed by the rubble around us, the dust settling in her hair as she continued to move. I thrust forward into her mouth, her lips sliding to the base.

I couldn't hold back any longer, it was too much. Hollering her name, I shot into her mouth and she pulled harder at me. My hips rocked as I rode out my climax, finally falling on top of her on the floor. It took a minute to get my breath back, and when I did I kissed Rose deeply, sucking at her tongue and lips. She was flushed and giggling when I sat up. We both looked around the room, surveying the damage.

Damn it.

This was going to be a bitch to fix.

Turning away from the gaping hole in the fireplace, I looked back down at Rose. She was sprawled on the floor under me, her Mrs. Clause outfit dirty and torn. I reached for her, helping her to stand, letting my fingers brush the sides of her tits. Her hand slid slowly down my arm, "brushing" dirt off of me.

"Looks like you got a little dirty. Let Mama Clause take care of you."

I loved it when we played Santa and Mrs. Clause. It totally made Christmas the most wonderful time of the year.

"Yeah, I could use a little help getting clean." I smiled at her, ready to throw her back down on the floor and rip that little get-up off of her. Instead, I wrapped my hands around her tiny waist; picking her up and holding her against my chest.

"Well, we better hurry up before my husband gets home. He's busy delivering packages to all the good girls and boys but he'll be back soon."

"I've got a big package for you, baby." I smirked, dragging my tongue up her throat and grabbing her ass, grinding her pussy against me.

She continued breathlessly, "I mean, I have an "in" with the big guy, but if he were to catch you here with me, we'd both be in trouble."

What? I thought I was the big guy. "Wait, so I'm not Santa?"

"Emmett, get your head in the game." she moaned.

We are playing "Fucking Santa's wife." Got it.

My mouth was back on her throat, and I started walking us upstairs to the master bathroom. It had one of those waterfall showers with all the jets. Rose loved it when it got real hot. I did too.

I set her in and turned on the water, turning the handle all the way hot. I watched as the water poured down her body, soaking us almost instantly. Her nipples were puckered and ripe for my mouth so I peeled her top down baring her amazing tits to me. God, she was so fucking hot. Licking my lips I leaned forward and took her nipple in my mouth.

"Well, for one, you are going to fuck another man's wife right now."

I nodded, humming, my mouth full of her breast. The vibrations spread out through her skin and she whimpered, making me smile. I let her nipple slide out between my teeth before speaking.

"I am and I bet Santa never makes you feel like this."

Holding her up against the wall, I slid her panties down her legs.

"He's always so busy, making all of those toys." Her voice broke as my tongue slid up the inside of her thigh, just grazing her slit. I nuzzled in, sucking her clit into my mouth, humming again and making her body writhe against the tile. Her hands dug into my hair, tugging me forward until I my face was buried in her. "He never touches me…oh…he leaves me all by myself." She rode my tongue, my hands on her hips guiding her as she came.

She hadn't stopped shaking when I stood up letting her slide her down my chest until she hovered just over my cock. She squirmed, moaning before I thrust up into her with a groan.

"I bet Santa never gives it to you like this." I punctuated each word with a thrust, my whole body working each swing. "Dude is deranged, leaving his hot wife to go hang out with a bunch of elves? Fucking creepy. I mean, I…"

She grabbed my chin and cut me off with a stern look, "Emmett, stay on track."

Yeah.

Stay on track. Don't think about a fat guy in a red suit; think about his hot wife you are fucking.

Right.

"What about you, Mrs. Clause? Do you think he can see us right now…being naughty but oh so fucking nice?"

She whimpered again, and nodded, unable to say anything more that "oh" or "yes". Her eyelids were fluttering and she wasn't going to last much longer. I _knew _Isure as hell wasn't.

"Are you getting something out of Santa's sack this year for Christmas? Or just mine?"

I was pushing us against the wall, hard when we heard it. Another crack.

Rose just put her hands on my shoulders and worked herself up and down my cock, ignoring the sound. She started convulsing around me, her head rolling back as she bit her lip.

"Oh, oh, oh."

She came, hard, bucking wildly and I wasn't long after her. We both slid to the floor, still wrapped up together.

The tile was cracked, the plaster was a mess and I could hear the structure groaning. Shit. If we broke another house, Esme was going to kill us.

Well, not KILL us, but she won't be happy.

Rose opened her eyes and looked up at me laughing. "Again?"

"Well, we might be okay. I mean, we'll just have someone look at the tile and…"

And that's when it happened. My words were cut off as chunks of the exterior wall fell down into the snow outside and suddenly we could see the sky, the mountains.

"I always thought this room could use another window."

I laughed at her reasoning and pulled her closer into my arms. "God, I love the snow." Nuzzling my nose into her neck, "At least we are having a white Christmas."

She chuckled at me, before pushing me down on my back on the tile. "Well I, for one, have not finished playing with my present…Santa knew _just_ what I wanted this year!"

Swinging her leg over me she straddled my hips, squeezing my cock in her hands. "He even knew what size to get me. Big."

I groaned. "He knew you didn't want to have a Merry _little _Christmas!"

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AN: So, do you think they will like Em and Rose's holiday get away?

**AC: Probably more than Esme will and besides, how could they not love it, I mean...Mrs. Santa Rose, naked Emmett, xmas roleplaying, and home renovation...what's not to love...**

AN: This is true. But I think Emmett would be upset that we called it "our _little_ contribution" to the contest.

**AC: Haha, you're probably right. Well, now that we finished that, what do we do?**

AN: Hmm, seems like we had something else we were working on...oh, wait...Highwayman!

**AC: You're right. Nobleward needs some love and attention.**

AN: And we are just the girls to give it to him!


End file.
